Shut Up, Malevolent Dragon! I Don’t Want to Have Any More Children With You

Vol. 3 Ch. 34

The next day, the Melkvey family arrived at Sky City.

Rosvisser had booked an appointment with the same photographer, Selena, who had taken Noa’s admission photos last time.

When Selena saw the seven-member family standing in front of her, she was taken aback.

Most dragon families typically had two or three members, rarely more than five.

But this family... anyone who didn’t know better might have thought they were gathering to take down an S-class dangerous creature.

However, regardless of how many people were present, Selena was confident in her ability to take the perfect family photo for them, using her professional skills.

After a bit of hustle, Selena informed Rosvisser that the photos would be ready by the evening.

While waiting for the pictures to be developed, the Melkvey family decided to explore Sky City.

Meanwhile, Isha and Grandma Veronica hung back, allowing some distance between themselves and Rosvisser, Leon, and the children.

“Grandma, after talking with you last night, I’ve decided I want to test my brother-in-law’s origins,” Isha said quietly.

Grandma Veronica had anticipated this. Her eldest granddaughter had always been someone who took action and never lost interest once her curiosity was piqued.

“How do you plan to go about it?”

“Remember how we listed a few possible races yesterday? I’ll start by testing based on those races’ traits,” Isha explained. “We can use each race’s innate abilities and characteristics to see how my brother-in-law responds, and from that, we might deduce his origins. What do you think, Grandma?”

Veronica gazed at Leon’s back, her mind working quietly before she finally responded, “Alright. Which race are you planning to start with?”

Isha thought for a moment. “Let’s start with... the Garuda Tribe.”

Grandma raised her eyebrows. “Do you know much about them?”

Isha grinned mischievously and leaned in toward her grandmother. “Grandma, did you notice anything different about me today?”

Veronica gave her a once-over, her gaze landing on Isha’s eyes. “You have dark circles.”

“Exactly~” Isha laughed. “I stayed up late last night researching the traits of those races, all so I can properly test my brother-in-law’s origins today!”

Grandma shook her head with a helpless smile. “If you put this level of dedication into developing your tribe, the Red Dragons would already be among the top-ranked dragon clans.”

Though she said that, the Red Dragons, like Rosvisser’s Silver Dragons, were already quite prominent within the dragon ranks. Veronica’s comment was more of a parent’s hopeful wish for their child to excel.

Isha waved it off, bringing the conversation back to the matter at hand.

“The Garuda Tribe rules the skies. They have incredibly sharp dynamic vision and night vision,” she explained. “Considering how skilled my brother-in-law is at close combat, his dynamic vision must be excellent.”

“So... I want to test his night vision.”

Veronica nodded in agreement. “How do you plan to test it?”

Isha smirked and stopped walking, pointing to a shop nearby. “Over there.”

Veronica followed her granddaughter’s gaze. It was a—

Haunted house?

“You want to use something as childish as a haunted house to test your brother-in-law’s origins? Isn’t that a bit naive, Isha?”

Given their long lifespans, dragons had faced countless dangers and unknowns. Even the most laid-back tribes had braved their share of trials.

A haunted house was something designed for young or inexperienced dragons, not adults who had ventured beyond the safety of their homes.

Isha shrugged. “I know the haunted house might not scare him, but that’s not the point. The point is that the environment inside is perfect for testing night vision. If my brother-in-law can move through it easily, without hesitation, then his bloodline is definitely suspicious.”

Isha’s reasoning wasn’t without merit.

Dragons were undoubtedly one of the most near-perfect species on the continent of Samael, but they did have a few minor flaws.

For example... their vision.

More specifically—night vision.

Dragons had vertically slit pupils, resembling narrow slits.

This eye structure allowed them to precisely track their opponents' every move and lock onto prey during high-speed movements.

But the downside was that these vertically slit pupils couldn’t take in much light, especially at night, leading to a slight decrease in their vision.

(When in human form, the shape of their pupils changed slightly, but it didn’t entirely fix the dragons’ night vision problem.)

Of course, this didn’t mean that dragons became blind at night.

Their “weak night vision” was only considered weak compared to their other superior abilities.

In a place as dark as a haunted house, even dragons who had braved countless dangers would struggle to see their surroundings.

Isha planned to use this fact to test her brother-in-law’s bloodline.

“Alright, we’ll do it your way,” Veronica agreed.

Isha was surprised. “Oh, Grandma, I thought you wouldn’t want to play along.”

“Heh... let’s just say I could use a bit of excitement in my otherwise peaceful old age.”

Veronica’s eyes lingered on Leon’s back as she lowered her voice. “Besides... I’m curious to see what kind of man Rosvisser has married.”

With the plan in place, Isha immediately called out to the others, suggesting they all go to the haunted house.

The children were, of course, the most excited.

Noa: *Great! I’ll stay calm in the haunted house, so I’ll seem more grown-up!*

Moon: *Awesome! Once we go in, I’ll hide in my sister’s arms the moment I see a ghost!*

Aurora: *Perfect! I can scare the ghosts!*

Seeing how eager the girls were, Leon and Rosvisser had no objections.

“I’ll stay outside. I’m too old for these thrills,” Veronica said. “I’ll wait for you at the exit.”

“Alright, Grandma.”

The group bought their tickets, and the staff reminded them:

“No using dragon flame or other light magic inside the haunted house! If you get lost, just recite the ‘spell’ on your ticket, and a ‘little sprite’ will guide you out!”

Leon looked down at the “spell” printed on his ticket.

Ah, he understood now.

It was a safeword.

He’d actually been thinking of coming up with a safeword for his *other* activities with Rosvisser lately. If her *S* tendencies awakened any more, he might not be able to keep up.

Leon chuckled to himself as he held Moon’s hand and followed the others into the haunted house.

Inside, just as Isha predicted, it was pitch black. You couldn’t see your hand in front of your face, and the only source of light was the occasional flickering ambient light, barely enough to make out vague shapes.

“Sister~ Where are you?”

“I’m right here.”

“Where is here? I can’t see you! I’m all alone, I’m scared, waaah~”

“When you came in, I saw you holding Papa’s hand.”

“...”

“Papa! Can I use an uppercut on the ghost?”

“Uh, I think that might cause some legal issues...”

“Hey, could you not ruin the atmosphere with your bad jokes at a time like this?!”

“Where’s the path? Where’s the—oh, what’s that glowing green thing up ahead?!”

“What glowing gre—ahhh! A ghost!! We really can’t use magic? Dad, just burn that thing already!!”

Chaos ensued in the darkness.

“Dragon queen, are you... scared?”

“You think I’d be scared of something this childish?”

“Then why are you holding my hand?”

“Don’t be ridiculous. It’s not me.”

“Then who is it?”

“It’s~~~ me~~~”

“Motherf—!!”

Leon stopped himself from cursing and almost used *Chidori* on the spot.

After the first wave of jump scares, the Melkvey family and the neighboring family continued through the haunted house.

They encountered a few more jump scares, but by now, they were getting used to it.

Still, the pitch-black environment made progress slow.

Not to mention, there were a few other issues—

“Leon, if you step on my tail one more time, I’ll cut off yours!” Rosvisser growled through gritted teeth in the darkness.

Leon chuckled nervously and lowered his voice, “That would be a wasted threat. I don’t have a tail.”

“I’m talking about the one in front.”

“...”

Leon felt a sudden chill down below and quickly took Moon’s hand—though by now, he wasn’t even sure if he was still holding Moon’s hand. But whoever it was, getting out was the priority—and hurried toward the exit.

After a few more hurdles, they finally made it through the haunted house.

The neighboring family was still buzzing with excitement, discussing which ghost had scared them the most.

Leon looked down to confirm that Moon was still by his side.

Phew, good. At least he hadn’t lost his daughter.

He turned to check on Noa, who calmly walked out with no expression on her face, completely unfazed.

Leon blinked, realizing something. He glanced around. “Aurora, where’s Aurora?!”

“I’m here, Papa.”

Leon followed the sound of her voice and saw the little pink-haired girl dragging a “ghost” by its collar as she exited the haunted house.

“He said I was cute and wanted to hug me, which triggered my uppercut reflex. Then he... fainted,” Aurora explained innocently.

The staff member at the exit sighed,

 their mouth twitching slightly. “That’s the third time this month... Ah, well, I’ll file a workplace injury report.”

Rosvisser flicked her tail at Leon, grumbling about how many times he had stepped on it inside the haunted house.

Isha watched the scene unfold with a frown.

Grandma Veronica approached her. “So? What’s your conclusion?”

Isha shook her head. “He’s not from the Garuda Tribe.”

“Oh? You’re sure already?”

“Yes.”

Isha picked up her own tail with a look of resignation. “In the haunted house, my brother-in-law stepped on my tail 11 times, Rosvisser’s 23 times, and the other family’s tail 48 times. With vision like that, there’s no way he’s from the Garuda Tribe.”

Grandma chuckled softly, covering her mouth. “Alright, alright. What’s next on the list?”

Isha turned her gaze toward Leon and said slowly,

“Lightning Elf.”